馬刺小將沃克剪去高聳辮子頭 自揭幼時遭性虐「頭髮成了我的面具」
▲馬刺小將沃克剪去高聳的辮子頭，自曝兒時遭性侵。（圖／達志影像／美聯社，下同）
高聳的辮子頭是馬刺21歲小將沃克(Lonnie Walker IV)的獨特標記，他卻在本週理成平頭，並在個人IG揭開關於「頭髮」的悲傷故事。他自曝小學5年級時遭到親戚性侵和性虐待，當時的他懵懂無知，卻留下揮之不去的夢魘；當他感到不安時，頭髮成了他的面具，現在他決定剪去傷痛，迎向新生。
馬刺2年級生沃克最近因爲協助清理黑人抗爭活動現場的塗鴉，併爲其他志工送水的溫心舉動，登上新聞版面；不過溫暖的他，內心卻埋藏了一個無人知曉的痛苦回憶。他12日在個人IG貼上自己剪去高聳辮子頭的影片，揭開這個被當成他「獨特標記」的髮型背後的悲傷故事。
「我在小學5年級開始留長頭髮的真實原因，是因爲頭髮是我隱藏自己的僞裝。」沃克自曝小學5年級時遭到親戚性虐待，「我被性騷擾、強暴和性虐待，我甚至已經習慣，因爲在那個年紀，我根本不知道這意味着什麼。」他說自己是一個容易受欺騙又好奇的孩子，「我不知道真正世界的樣子。」
The real truth as to why i started doing this early 5th grade, it was a cloaking device for me. During the summer of my 5th grade year I was around more family. Some that names will be left alone I was around more. I was sexually harassed, raped, abused, I even got accustomed to it because being at that age you don’t know what is what. I was a gullible curious kid that didn’t know what the real world was. I had a mindset that my hair was something that I can control. My hair was what I can make and create and be mine. And it gave my confidence. As of recently I wasn’t at my best. Previous History popping up in my head and it sucked mentally “demons”..... because of this virus, I began to truly look at myself in the mirror and see who I truly was even behind closed doors. Long story short I have found peace and internal happiness through this journey god willingly. I forgave everyone even the people that don’t deserve it why? Because it’s dead weight. Time doesn’t wait on anyone so why should I waste my time on it ? Me cutting my hair was more than a cut. My hair was a mask of me hiding the insecurity’s that I felt the world wasn’t ready for. But now better then ever. Out with old. In with the new. I have shed my skin mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Life will always be hard. Gotta play with the cards your dealt with and try and make a winning hand. And if you lose. It’s never a lost. It’s a lesson . I’m gonna be off this for awhile still growing through this. Just know I love each and everyone one of y’all. Peace love and happiness
Lonnie Walker IV（@buddah）分享的貼文 於 PDT 2020 年 6月 月 11 日 下午 5:52 張貼
「我有一種心態，那就是頭髮是我可以控制的東西，那是屬於我，我可以自己創造的東西，這給了我自信。」 沃克坦承最近「過去的惡魔」又纏上他，那些惡夢再次浮現在他的腦海中，影響了他的心理狀況；不過因爲疫情的關係，他開始重新審視自己，正視那個真正的自己。
「我已經找到內心的平靜與快樂，我原諒了所有的人，甚至那些不值得原諒的人。爲什麼呢？因爲那太過沉重了。」沃克說，「時間不等人，所以我爲什麼要在這件事上浪費時間，我不單單是剪去頭髮，頭髮是我的面具，隱藏了我的不安全感。」
沃克遮住了自己的臉，頭上高聳的辮子離開了他的身體，也意味着他丟掉了遮掩內心傷痛的「面具」，「但現在，我比任何時候感覺都更棒，告別過去，迎接新生。」他直言，「生活永遠都很難，但要好好掌握手上的那副牌，試着贏得勝利。如果你輸了，其實永遠沒有輸這回事，那是一個教訓。」
沃克的經紀人朗伯格(George Langberg)也透過聲明表示，沃克確實長年活在幼時遭受性侵和性虐的陰影中，他願意公開說出來，展現了無比的勇氣與力量，同時也減輕自己的負擔，「他希望幫助那些也曾受到性虐而現在正在看他的故事的人，或是現在有類似遭遇的人，讓他們知道自己並不孤單。」